What makes risk "risky"?

Life is full of uncertainty. There is only a small percentage of individuals who like to “take risks”, whereas most are more comfortable with “playing it safe.” What we fail to understand is that maintaining status quo or seeking safe havens also contain risk. It’s just not as obvious. Thus, making sense of risk is not as easy as it seems for most people.

Consider the domesticated turkey.


The turkey spends the first 1000 days of its life in great comfort, eating well in air conditioned rooms. If you asked the turkey about its prospects for life, it would say its great and always will be. The turkey is very content with status quo, believes strongly in its future, and would never “take the risk” to change it. There is no perspective of uncertainty. On the 1001^st day someone comes to take it to slaughter. Where did the risk lie? The future was outside of the turkey's control, but the turkey didn't know it. The risk was in the truth about the turkey's future, not in how strongly the turkey believed about the future based on its data.

The American Dictionary of the English Language published in 1828 by Noah Webster defines risk as “exposure to harm or loss.” The exposure has as much to do with the uncertainty of the environment around us as the actions we take themselves. GET THIS. Human nature is to place concern about risk on what we do and not to the nature of the situation. The RISK is more about the future in which we must act than what we do.

For instance, when considering a financial investment, we might say that investing in stocks expecting 8% return is “too risky” because the stock may go down, so we invest in 5 yr government bonds earning 2% or just hold cash. The so called less risky action may actually contain more risk because if 4 % inflation hits, we lose money with cash or low interest bonds. The risk lies not in our action (or inaction) as much as it does in future conditions.

This occurs in job decisions too. A person may seek to “hang on” to their current job because taking a new job with another company has too many uncertainties (risks). They find later that their company is being sold or is downsizing and they are losing the job they so desperately sought to keep. The risk was in inaction in an uncertain future, not in the person's action anticipating the future. Apply this to relationships!! Ohhhhhh!

You see, our EXPOSURE to harm or loss exists in both action and inaction because risk is sourced in the uncertainties of the future, not in the uncertainties of our action. We cannot avoid risks. We can only mitigate them or manage them. We do this by taking actions that reduce our vulnerability to future events based on their likelihood (probability) of their occurrence. We can reduce our exposure, but we cannot eliminate it. Because the world keeps changing, we must realize doing nothing and clinging to status quo may be the most “risky” thing we can do.

BTW, the difference between taking a risk and taking a chance is that chance is ignoring the possible consequences of our action or inaction. Running across a highway without considering the speed we are running and the number and speed of cars on the highway is “taking a chance”, not risk.

Finally, there is an interesting word that contradicts the notion that risk must exist because the future is uncertain, thereby exposing us to harm or loss. That word is HOPE. Noah Webster gives us two definitions of hope. The most common one we use means “a desire with at least some expectation or belief it will happen.” This is a little stronger than just a wish, but still recognizes the future is not predictable or assured. Then there is HOPE that means assurance, full confidence that something in the future will happen. This is the word used by God in His Word relative to our inheritance as His adopted child.

We live with a full assurance that He loves us and that the privileges and promises of His Kingdom are ours. It cannot be destroyed, tarnished or taken from us. This form of hope is the opposite of risk in that there is no exposure to harm or loss. A carnal mind cannot make sense of the second form of hope and is destined to live out life with fear and anxiety that just around the corner there is the possibility of harm or loss, the 1001st day in the turkey's life.

Risk management is not the actions we take today to control the outcomes of the future, but to take actions today to mitigate the consequences of the future over which we have no control.

So, what makes life risky – for the carnal mind its more the uncertainty of the future not the actions we take (or inaction) to protect ourselves from the future.  Risk is determined by the truth of the future, not the “safety” of our actions.

Feeling 'lucky' today?

There's a familiar saying among us Southerners when a person just can't seem to get a break. We say, "he (or she) has buzzard luck, can't kill nuttin' and nuttin' won't die".

Of course this only applies for those who place a lot of stock on "LUCK" to make sense of themselves and things around them     :-) :-)

"The Gift in You"

"we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God and not of us."
2 Corinthians 4:7

excerpts from the book"The Gift in You"  by Dr Caroline Leaf:

"In  order to sustain a consistent outlook and pattern, your thoughts, your words, your spirit, and your actions must line up. That means when you say something that your brain doesn't 'believe' - if your statement isn't part of you on a cellular level - it is unsustainable."

"You were not built to struggle. Your brain is wired to function according to a specific sequence. When you discover that sequence, that structure, you unlock great potential. ... You can learn more quickly, think more clearly, process faster, accomplish more, and become a better leader as you see other people for how they are uniquely wired."

"It is incredibly exciting to realize that what we choose to think about and how we choose to think can switch our genes on and off, changing the structure and function of our brain. The way in which we think will impact the health of our brains and our bodies... Even more exciting is that we each have a unique and distinct gift that impacts how we think.... We can alter brain anatomy in a positive love direction or a negative fear direction by how and what we choose to think."

"If we start building fear pathways by entertaining toxic thinking, such as bitterness, anxiety, anger, unforgiveness, and so on, we can wire negative and rigid behaviors into the brain, which become 'gift blockers'. A 'gift blocker' has a damaging physical and chemical effect on the brain, resulting in inflammation, which interrupts the cycle of thought in some way and hinders the ability to think clearly."

"Deep inside us is the awareness of self, and the desire to be understood. Our cry as we go through life is 'does anyone out there understand me?' When we operate out of fear of rejection, fear of pain, and fear of abuse, we cannot believe anyone wants to understand us, our fears work to thwart our desire for love and acceptance God hardwired in each of us."

"Love and fear are the root emotions and all other emotions grow from these... Love and fear cannot co-exist. When we operate in fear, we are at the mercy of the environment. Our gift will be blocked and our true self will vanish. Science has shown us that there is a "massive" unlearning of toxic thoughts when we operate in love. .. Love literally wipes out fear."

"Although you are not handed a roadmap for your life, there are road markers to ensure you are walking on your gifting - love and wisdom.... When you operate in your gifting, the brain is operating the way it was wired. ... The thought circuits in the brain are altered by experience, so the more you think in the way you were designed to think, operating in your gift, the more you develop your brain."

and finally

"To grow as a human being you need to move away from a 'disability focus' - focusing on your weaknesses and forgetting about your strengths. .. An over emphasis on trying to overcome weaknesses creates much of the unhappiness in our world."

Of course, there is much more about how the brain neurons and emotions are interdependent. Medical science has come a long way to reinforce what Scripture has already told us - 'we are fearfully and wonderfully made" and "perfect love casts out fear".

Pretty good stuff to ponder!!!

Making sense of suffering

‎"The suffering of the servants of God, borne with faith and even praise, is a shattering experience to apathetic saints whose lives are empty in the midst of countless comforts." -Piper


One of my favorite topics in the Bible is the notion of suffering. Its one of the words that is difficult to make sense of for many Christians. Quotes like the one above suggests that "sufferings" of God's people is born of affliction and pain. The truth is that there are over 20 different Greek words translated into the word "suffering" in the New Testament. Some are far from meaning painful affliction such as "suffer the little children to come unto me" (Jesus). Here the word for suffer simply means "allow". 


There are several words that do suggest affliction or pain. "Dipsao" used 16 times means to suffer from thirst. "Zemioo" (I Corinth 3:13) is used to denote sustained damage. "Tino" means to pay a penalty. "Pathema" (used 16 times) is the Greek word we most associate with suffering, it means the external experience of a calamity, misfortune, or affliction.

However, the most often used Greek word in the New Testament for " suffer" is "pascho", used 41 times and 16 in I Peter alone. "Pascho" simply means the emotions of the human experience. It refers not to whether the experience is good or bad but the internal human response we experience to some external circumstance. Peter often refers to the "pascho" (sufferings) of Christ. 


This is a reference to the internal human response Christ had to events around Him. He was exalted and He was rejected. He experienced the entire realm of human emotion, PERFECTLY. So to make sense of the notion of the "fellowship of His suffering" as a believer in  Christ, we note that Paul says (in Philippians) he desires to be so intimate with Christ as to allow the Christ in him to inform his emotions so that he has Kingdom responses to ALL external stimuli, whether seen as favorable OR unfavorable to the carnal mind.


NOW, that is the kind of suffering that brings us JOY. ...... Think about it ....

4 months of blogging

Its been four months now since I started blogging. Over the years people have asked when I am going to write a book on all this stuff running around in my head. A book brings more fame and money, but I have found blogging to be more fun. Since I don't need the former, I'll stay with the latter.

While there haven't been a lot of comments, the profoncall is approaching 1,300 page views. While I M not really sure what a "page view" is, I think it means someone is visiting the blog site.As long as there are readers, I will be a blogger!!

Being right is just not enough

         

Some people (like me) were designed to seek out the truth in the world around us. My personality profile says I desire to explain the world, not control it. While the passion and competencies to find truth can and have been a benefit many times, there is a downside when it comes to relationships.

One story about my son I remember fondly (hope he doesn't mind me telling it) is when he was in college. I get a call one day from him and he says, "dad, my French professor just slugged me!" That was not a common thing to say so I listened for the explanation. The professor had returned an exam and there was a question marked "wrong" which Doug KNEW was right. Everything inside Doug was saying, "you must bring this to the prof's attention" but Doug's mind was saying "let it ride." However, the truth seeking soul won out and Doug pressed the prof about it. The discussion escalated as Doug followed his prof back to his office where from frustration of not being able to PROVE to the prof he was wrong, Doug finally says, "well, you are just stupid!" The French prof was actually French and the word stupid meant something very different to him, so being severely offended, the prof hauls off and hits Doug.

I can remember thinking (maybe even saying), "what a lesson to learn, being right is just not enough."

I found myself that the constant pursuit of "being right" produces a sense of arrogance that builds a wall between me and others. Its amazing how often we press our point with others until we destroy, or at least disrupt, fellowship with each other. This is particularly true when we pride ourselves on being smart. One lesson that would be good for some of us is to pursue the relationship more than truth. Nothing wrong with being smart and seeking what is true, but real wisdom is knowing how our "being right" feels like control to others, even when that may not really be our intent.   Something to ponder ......

what a difference a chromosome makes!!

                 

Our recent culture and especially the feminist movement of the 70's and 80's wish to make men and women equal. What is confused here is the difference between equality of opportunity and "sameness."
Men and women are fundamentally different and that fact particularly affects motivation.

We learn in the Bible that as a result of the fall, women look to men for love and respect and men seek pleasure and respect mainly from their work. This is essentially the message in the 1980's best seller "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." Many others have acknowledged the difference in men and women mainly through what we call the needs/drive motivation model. That is to say men and women are fundamentally motivated differently. Men seek pleasure from women and want to fix them when they are broken, while women just want men to listen, to care, and not see them as an object.

A recent research article in applied psychology found men typically seek status based careers while women seek "socio-emotional" satisfiers in their career choices. In Etheridge's book "Wild at Heart" men are described as desirous of fighting battles, living an adventure, and rescuing beauty while women seek to be fought for, to share the adventure, and to unveil her beauty. James Dobson often claimed that "men give love to get sex and women give sex to get love" as the exchange that draws and holds couples together on a human plane (social exchange).

Now if you believe in God or at least in some higher being that created us, why would a divine creator design men and women so differently and then say "become one and enjoy the greatest intimacy known to human kind"? I don't think God is a masochist. What's His plan or purpose for heterosexual relationships? (note: I know it is not His plan but wouldn't golfing buddies (or garden club members) get along better if they were married to each other?) See, ultimately social exchange breaks down as an adequate force to hold a relationship together. At some point there fails to be equilibrium in meeting each other's needs.

If men and women could reach high level of intimacy through social exchange, then we would not need God. Unless Jesus is the "tuning fork" in the relationship between men and women, the relationship cannot gain and maintain intimacy (the ultimate source of joy). The chromosome difference is God's plan for us to seek Him in our relationship with each other, to depend on His power to give us the grace to really love unconditionally. Agape love (grace) is the only way the chromosome difference leads to joy and not disappointment.    Think about it ....

role of the father

Parenting is a tough job. I have a great heart for mothers who work hard to balance duties of the home with other outside pressures and still maintain her needs and desires to be a woman. But, fathers can affect the family in substantial and dramatic ways. Although a wife may work and even earn more than the husband, the father provides for and the protects the family in many ways. The man was designed to be the "spiritual head" of the family. So what does that mean?

Well, it doesn't mean he has a God given right to order everyone around and wield his power as he chooses. It means that he has the greatest responsibility in being for his family what God is to all of us, the source of redemptive grace that transforms and sustains. If I had to state the father's role in one sentence, it would be "to make grace operative in his home."

Well, what does that look like?

Often well meaning parents believe their objective is to produce "perfect kids." Forging out kids who do all the right things is the greatest enemy of the above stated role of the father. The best weapon of the father is not a loud, demanding, stern voice and lots of rules. It's more an affirming word, calm demeanor when the child messes up, and a big hug when the child really screws up.

The worst thing a parent, particularly the father, can say to his child is "how dare you do this to me!"
Delinking one's on welfare from their child's behavior is the start to making grace operative in the home. When a child feels that their father's well-being is dependent on the child's behavior, then the child is in bondage to the father's happiness. This does not mean that inappropriate behavior is not dealt with, it means that it is dealt with AFTER the child has been affirmed and loved. A principle I found helpful here is "a father should focus on the child's need and his own behavior, not his own need and the child's behavior (which is more the norm)."

One of the more interesting aspects of this is body language. When the father shows he is pleased when the child succeeds and displeased when the child fails, the child gets the message, "dad is happy when I do good and sad (mad) when i do bad." Fathers, learn to celebrate failure. Rejoice when the errant child "comes home."

After all, isn't this really what the Heavenly Father does for us?  think about it .....

Why? Why? Why?

"why doesn't this person speak to me anymore?'
"why did my friend say this negative thing about me?"
and my grand daughter recently asked, "why would a friend violate my trust?"

and of course, the biggies, "why do good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people?"

Herrmann's brain dominance research noted that "why?" is a fundamental question governed by the upper right quadrant of the brain. We equate the ability to answer the "why?" questions to higher order knowledge called wisdom.

Yet, King Solomon admonishes us about the futility of such questions because meaning in life is determined only by God, and wisdom comes from recognizing this. - Ecclesiastes 7

This point is supported by the popular scripture "trust in God with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."

Making sense out of events in our life by pursuing the "why?" question seems then to be carnally minded.
Our human mind is governed by "cause and effect" logic.
Might we become more Kingdom minded if we ask God His perspective instead of pursuing and demanding answers to the question "why?"

This blogs for me!!    The rest of you can ponder it too if you'd like :-)

"Man, have you no shame?"

There was a great discussion this morning among Christian men about the notion of feeling shame when we sin. While some of the debate centered around not having a common meaning for the word shame, some of the tension is our difficulty of making sense of ourselves without the influence of our carnal mind.

If a word can mean anything then it means nothing, so what does shame mean? It literally means "covering ourselves," but it's more applied meaning is to feel the pain of disgrace. Once Adam and Eve were conscious of their sin, they "covered themselves". Thus, shame is a response to wrong doing that came with the Fall. Up until then, Adam and Eve "knew no shame." We may confuse the feeling of shame with the sense of grief. Grief is the pain of feeling "loss".

When we sin, we offend God by violating His purpose for our lives. We may and should feel grief in that we break fellowship (not relationship) with Him as we trust in getting our needs met through the world. However, we should not feel shame. Shame does not come from a Kingdom mind but from the carnal mind (our Fallen state). "Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus," who make sense of themselves and the world around them through things of the God's spirit.

God does not depend on our behavior to be honored. He is honored because He is God and His Son is the King. Those who trust God for their identity and value know that we are always graced, never disgraced. As a parent I would never want my children (or grandchildren) to "cover themselves" from me because of anything they did.  While they may regret disappointing me, I would not want fellowship to be broken, AND SO IT IS WITH GOD AND HIS CHILDREN. God said to Adam & Eve, "why are you hiding?"


It is sooooo difficult for us to make sense of ourselves through God's eyes. In some respect doing otherwise is just as sinful.   Is it just as sinful (outside God's will) to feel shame for telling a lie as it is to lie? Think about it .....

Blessed to be predestined?

Many acorns fall to the ground in the Fall of each year. I have to pull up each that becomes a tree in the Spring and there are many. However, what impresses me is how many fall to the same soil and do not become a tree. Aren't acorns made to become a tree. many more do not than do. Ummm ..









 "Blessed be God and the father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places."

Notice there are the three different Greek words used here: first is eulogetos meaning adorable or speak well toward (God is adored or receives our highest praise) next is eulogeo meaning extolled favor or prospered and third is eulogia meaning benefits

So this verse is best understood by the following "how adored by us is this God who granted to us His favor with every spiritual benefit of Heaven"

"In love He predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of His will."

Predestined simply means determined before - before what? Well, before we determined. In other words because He loved us (not the other way around), God decided that we would be His children through adoption. This is what He wanted. Is it not true that when parents adopt a child, the parents determined before the child did that the kid would be their child? This decision to adopt blesses the child and the child adores the parents. We think when someone adopts a child that is simply "hunkie doorie." Don't we?

Why then do we get our panties in a wad about God determining ahead of us that He wants to adopt us. What offends us so much about the word "predestined"?
See, words properly understood have power. However, when a word can mean anything (whatever we want), then it means nothing.

Think about it .... let's just quit worrying about what God determines for us before we can determine it and focus on the blessings of adoption determined for us by God and our life will be transformed!!!

judgmentalism from another angle

           

Many folks deal with the challenge to not be judgmental. Judging others is considered a form of self-righteousness and comes from not fully understanding or accepting the Grace by which we have been received by the King of the universe.

Seldom do we focus on the challenges we face when others judge us. How do we respond? How should we respond? How does the Gospel of Grace inform our response? When others condemn us because we fail or fail to meet some expectation, it hurts, especially when we wish to be thought well of by the other person. How do we get beyond this hurt? I don't mean how can we muster up enough of something to grin and bear it?

How can grace be active when someone we care about "demonizes" us? This is the truest test of what it means to love another with unmerited favor. It may be the closest we come to understanding just a little of how much God loves us because we are very good at accusing Him of all sorts of things when He doesn't be God like we expect Him to be.

Think about it ....