acting on your behalf

For most of my life I was conscious of how my capabilities and effort could create the life i desired. Exchanging my knowledge and skills for recognition, acceptance and financial rewards seemed in the realm of my control. My challenge was to grow my potential value to others and I would be fine.

Nothing like age to bring a sobering reality to youthful ideals. As I begin my fourth quarter in life and reflect on how the world really works, I see more clearly that my life's successes really involved others acting on my behalf, giving me permission to do what i do. Without these people and institutions granting me the right to contribute - my skills, knowledge, and passion had no game within which to play.

As a youth success in athletics was my measure of identity and value. While I worked hard and possessed some skills in football and basketball, unless the coach selected me to play, I had no opportunity for success. All along my career there were always someone who initiated the situation in which I could work and flourish. I had to be selected by a committee at Ga Tech to enter their doctoral program. Had they said "no", i would not be a GT Ph D. Looking to enter the University scene in my50's, I began to see the reality that unless someone invited me to join their faculty, I would not be a professor. While i was qualified to teach at most any university, only one reached out to me to give me the opportunity.

I feel now I have more flexibility and content to offer than at anytime in my life. Yet, I am dependent on others to give me the venue. I, now more than ever, realize that while my competencies may be necessary, they are not sufficient for being successful at doing what i do. I am sure all of you have faced this along your life's journey. You got your college degree, but companies were looking for experience. You had paid your dues at your job, but the company chose someone else to promote. It may have been in relationships where you wanted to be with someone badly, but they would not give you the chance. The notion that someone else must act on our behalf for us to have what we want is humbling indeed.

More humbling is that the criteria as to whether you get the chance is not your knowledge, skills, abilities, and willingness (effort). It is whether the person, who must act on your behalf, sees you within their vision for what they want. Social Exchange is not a function of just what you have to offer, but also a function of what is valued by the other person.

This is the reason that the equilibrium imperative of our flesh sets us up for eventually being joyless, feeling a sense of fear, despair, and insignificance.Its then we must remember that there is One who has acted on our behalf when we could not, God. He came to us, providing a way to be with Him. This Grace is totally independent of equilibrium.

So when we find ourselves where we are waiting on someone to act on our behalf to make our life right, take time to ponder the action of the One who really matters :-)