Studies show that the main three coping responses are fight, flight or tend. Some think males are more likely to fight or flight and females to tend or befriend.
More recent studies focus on emotion regulation, which is the process of dealing with negative emotions of in one of two ways. The most common and most destructive way to keep from acting on negative feelings of stress is to suppress the felt emotion. This in essence buries the emotion deep inside the person, only to emerge sometimes later in unsuspected forms of outburst or withdrawal.
What psychologists have found that is the healthiest and most effective way to deal with situations causing stress is to reappraise. This involves thinking about the situation in different ways so that the negative felt emotion does not continue to occur. Some call this seeing a problem as an opportunity or the power of positive thinking.
Here's where my question comes in. As I listen to preaching and go to Bible studies, invariably the topic is dealing with the struggles of life. The Bible is quoted providing God's character and promises. These are true, but they seem to be presented more in light of reappraisal, or some human scheme to think differently about the situation. While this can be helpful, how does the world see Christianity as anything but another form of coping.
For instance, I have really appreciated the preaching I have been receiving recently at a new church we are attending. The pastor has been quite thorough and on target with his messages of the Gospel. Today he preached on the Beatitude, "blessed are the meek." This is a verse I was just thinking about as I blogged on Spot a day or so ago.
http://profoncall.blogspot.com/2016/02/understanding-how-we-are-bred.html
The pastor said the word "meek" is not about being "weak." To that I agree. He then says that meek really means "strength under control" and proceeds to explain the 3 ways we can control our thoughts to feel less discouraged about the situation we are in. I am thinking, "how is this different from the human practice of reappraisal?" He made me uneasy and seemed to feed right into my concern about this question, "Is Christianity just another coping mechanism?"
What did he miss? Why is Christianity not just another way to cope with stress? Here's why. The word "meek" does mean the strength of control, but whose control? The word was used in its original form to explain a domesticated animal or pet. It means having our thoughts and emotions completely under the control of the master. Spot is under Gail's control. He does not provide the capability and desire to control himself to meet her expectations. He is not doganly (instead of humanly)capable, rather he submits his will to her. This is what trained pets do. Spot submits his will, not reappraise his situations. He is totally sold out to Gail as his master. he thinks she is everything. Now occasionally his nature takes over and he disobeys Gail. I suspect that is what happens to us too.
However, the Christian life is one where our power comes from submission not vice versa. Plus, submission comes from adoration and thanksgiving, not duty and obligation. That is, what is different? This is what makes the life of a Christian full of joy, like Spot, regardless of the situation.
While the difference in reappraisal and submission may seem subtle, it is profound and life changing. While repentance does mean reappraisal or change the mind. The change is that we are trusting our master, which reduces our stress, and not our own ability to handle our stress. I am sad the pastor failed to take the congregation across that bridge into glory. It was the right direction, just not far enough.
We need to always be ready to ponder the message of the Gospel and whether what we receive takes us across that bridge, beyond human endeavor ....
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